Thursday, August 20, 2009

B.O. Raises a Roller Coaster Stink

By Douglas V. Gibbs

I love a good roller coaster. My wife and son are not so fond of them, but my daughter is a daredevil like me, and searches out the scariest rides she can find. Part of the fun of a roller coaster is to let go of the bar in front of you and reach for the sky. Releasing the security of a death grip adds a little pizazz to the ride. Makes it a little more fun.

During the biggest dips and loops it is not uncommon to see the riders of a frighteningly fun roller coaster screaming with their hands in the air, and their armpits exposed. At a British amusement park in Chartsey, England, Thorpe Park roller coaster connoisseurs may no longer reach for the sky. The patrons have been banned from putting their arms in the air during roller coaster rides due to concerns about body odor.

The director of Thorpe Park in Chertsey, England, said, "Guests who do not keep their elbows at their sides will be kicked off rides, and repeat offenders will be escorted out of the park."

Apparently, when it gets warm out during the summer, the level of body odor goes up, and the park has received a few complaints about stinky riders. So, based on a few complaints, the ban was put in place hoping to ensure that "guests have the most enjoyable experience and aren't exposed to any unsavory armpits."

I, personally, have come across a few smelly coaster riders in my day. Rather than complain to the park, I just grin and bear it. My suggestion, should you know of such an individual, is for you to do as I do, and invest in some deodorant for them, and hand the extra-dry, super-duty anti-perspirant to the person when you have them alone - adding the words, "This brand may help you more than the other one."

Of course it only works well if the person is a close friend, or family member, that doesn't freak out when given suggestions of this nature. Otherwise, you may receive breath mints, or foot odor spray, in return.

It's better than a nanny-state ride park dictating to the ride-goers whether or not they can put their hands in the air.

-- Political Pistachio Conservative News and Commentary

BO keeps elbows down on coasters - UPI

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