Friday, June 21, 2013

Email of the Week: Idiot Sightings

Yes, the world is full of stupid people.  I deal with them myself.

A sand and gravel driver asked me, "What is bird's eye?"

I replied, "It is gravel that is about the size of a bird's eye.  It is at the North Plant."

He then asked, "Is it in the rock section, or the sand section?"

........

At McDonald's I offered my checking account check card/MasterCard to pay for my meal, and the girl, after swiping the card, extended the key pad to me so that I may enter my P.I.N.  I said to her, "I want to use it as a MasterCard."

"You have to enter your P.I.N." she said.

"I don't know my P.I.N. for this card, just swipe it as a credit card."

She rolled her eyes ever so slightly, and called the manager.  He walked in, she explained to him too softly for me to know what is being said what she thought was the problem, and he leaned towards me, "Since no P.I.N. was entered, no transaction took place.  I will re-swipe it for you."

I nodded.

He re-swiped, and then extended the key pad towards me.

"I don't want to use it as a debit card," I said.

"You understand that using this card as a debit card is one of your choices," he said, as if that was the preferable choice.

"Yes, but I want to use it as a credit card."

He cancelled the transaction, and swiped the card, and then showed the girl that on the screen, there is a credit card choice, too.  She said to him, "But why would anyone use their card as a credit card?"

He replied, "No idea.  Why pay the interest?"

I spoke up, "I won't pay interest on money I am using from my checking account.  This is a checking account card."

"If you use it as a credit card transaction, you will," he quickly replied.

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Apparently, I am not the only one experiencing the rise of the stupid people.  The following was sent to me by Email:



Our society is doomed..............

IDIOT SIGHTING
I handed the teller @ my bank a withdrawal slip for $400.00
I said "May I have large bills, please"
She looked at me and said "I'm sorry sir, all the bills are the same size."
When I got up off the floor I explained it to her....


IDIOT SIGHTING
When my husband and I arrived at an automobile dealership to pick up our car, we were told the keys had been locked in it. We went to the service department and found a mechanic working feverishly to unlock the driver side door. As I watched from the passenger side, I instinctively tried the door handle and discovered that it was unlocked. 'Hey,' I announced to the technician, 'it's open!' His reply: 'I know. I already got that side.'

This was at the Ford dealership in Canton,MS

IDIOT SIGHTING
We had to have the garage door repaired.
The Sears repairman told us that one of our problems was that we did not have a 'large' enough motor on the opener.
I thought for a minute, and said that we had the largest one Sears made at that time, a 1/2 horsepower.
He shook his head and said, 'Lady, you need a 1/4 horsepower.' I responded that 1/2 was larger than 1/4.
He said, 'NO, it's not..' Four is larger than two.'

We haven't used Sears repair since.

IDIOT SIGHTING
My daughter and I went through the McDonald's take-out window and I gave the clerk a $5 bill.
Our total was $4.25, so I also handed her a quarter.
She said, 'you gave me too much money.' I said, 'Yes I know, but this way you can just give me a dollar bill back.
She sighed and went to get the manager, who asked me to repeat my request.
I did so, and he handed me back the quarter, and said 'We're sorry but we could not do that kind of thing.'
The clerk then proceeded to give me back $1 and 75 cents in change.

Do not confuse the clerks at McD's.


IDIOT SIGHTING IN FOOD SERVICE
My daughter went to a local Taco Bell and ordered a taco.
She asked the person behind the counter for 'minimal lettuce.'
He said he was sorry, but they only had iceburg lettuce.
-- From Kansas City



IDIOT SIGHTING
I was at the airport, checking in at the gate when an airport employee asked,
'Has anyone put anything in your baggage without your knowledge?'
To which I replied, 'If it was without my knowledge, how would I know?'
He smiled knowingly and nodded, 'That's why we ask.'

Happened in Birmingham , Ala.


IDIOT SIGHTING
The stoplight on the corner buzzes when it's safe to cross the street.
I was crossing with an intellectually challenged coworker of mine. She asked if I knew what the buzzer was for.
I explained that it signals blind people when the light is red.
Appalled, she responded, 'What on earth are blind people doing driving?!'

She was a probation officer in Wichita , KS


IDIOT SIGHTING
At a good-bye luncheon for an old and dear coworker who was leaving the company due to 'downsizing,'
our manager commented cheerfully, 'This is fun. We should do this more often.'
Not another word was spoken. We all just looked at each other with that deer-in-the-headlights stare.

This was a lunch at Texas Instruments.


IDIOT SIGHTING
I work with an individual who plugged her power strip back into itself
and for the sake of her life, couldn't understand why her system would not turn on.

A deputy with the Dallas County Sheriff’s office, no less.



IDIOT SIGHTING
How would you pronounce this child's name?
"Le-a"
Leah?? NO
Lee - A?? NOPE
Lay - a?? NO
Lei?? Guess Again.
This child attends a school in Kansas City, Mo.
Her mother is irate because everyone is getting her name wrong.
It's pronounced "Ledasha".
When the Mother was asked about the pronunciation of the name, she said, "the dash don't be silent."

SO, if you see something come across your desk like this please remember to pronounce the dash.
If dey axe you why, tell dem de dash don't be silent.


They walk among us......and they VOTE.

-- Political Pistachio Conservative News and Commentary

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