The Song of the Left

By Douglas V. Gibbs

Out of the Democratic Party, out of the singin' heart of the old Left, comes tales of Uncle Barry - rich in the simple lies, forever fresh and new.

Zippity-do-dah, Zippity-yay, my oh my oh what a liberal day. . .

"Yes, Sir, there are definitely ways to learn about the Left without doin' nothin' and gettin' kicked by them donkeys. Sure as my name is Douglas V. Gibbs, there are tales 'bout critters like Brer Pelosi, and Brer Reid, and Brer Gore, and Brer Hillary. We can learn a lot 'bout these folks so that we can learn 'bout life, and what not to do. After all, we were given two ears and one mouth, so I s'ppose it'd be good to listen for a little while to see what these critters are all 'bout.

I know they seem too busy to be talked to, and they think they are can-doers, but usually when they think they are some kind of elite, and able to do anything, they make themselves out to be fools. Birds of a feather flock together, I s'ppose. Like that Gavin Newsom, the Mayor of San Francisco. He wants to run for governor of California. If you remember back, this is the guy that said that homosexual marriage is comin', whether you like it or not. You see, his definition of morality must be crammed down your throat, even it it's wrong, because he thinks its right, and he'll make sure he uses the law to make it happen - even if it means using the government to change the definition of marriage, a definition that is not only thousands of years old, but one that is a biblical definition attached to the sanctity of marriage. Interestingly enough, Mr. Newsom has been endorsed by Brer Billy Clinton. Not because Bill likes Gavin, but because Bill don't like Jerry Brown.

Amazing, isn't it kids? These people claim to be all together in a collective way, but once they gain a little power, the cliques form, and the mafia mentality takes control.

Well, Gavin Newsom wants to do more than just justify the gay lifestyle. He thinks that you should be forced to change your behavior, too, by punishing you for buying sodas. Yep, he hates cigarettes, and now he says sweet drinks are just like cigarettes, needing to be regulated, controlled, and discouraged.

How dare you want to drink something he thinks is bad for you!

Next, he'll be going through your refrigerator and telling you what you are allowed to eat, too!

'Course, also from San Francisco is that little ol' Brer Pelosi, who's been cryin' cuz there are actually people that disagree with her insane ideas for a utopian America under the hand of the great Obama. Her sadness is especially centered around the opposition calling Uncle Barry a liar, and that his politics are socialistic in line with the type we've seen a few times in history.

Brer Pelosi says that such talk can lead to violence, and this is right after Brer Carter said that such talk is racist, too! So I s'ppose they just want us to be quiet and not disagree with them. If we stand up and call the president a liar, or somethin', then that makes us violent, racist domestic terrorists, and we can't be havin' that. Pelosi admitted she's clueless, though, so I'm not sure we should be listenin' to her much.

Heck, in fact some of them fringe minority right-wingers show'd up at Washington DC a while ago. Some say thousands, others say millions, but nonetheless, it has them Leftists awfully shook up. How could a minority of Americans put out such a large rally? Must be all of them showin' up, I s'ppose.

Either that, or the number of folks that oppose the Left is actually the majority.

-- Brer Pistachio Conservative Tidbits and Opinions