Immigration Vehicle Trends preview of the 2013 Government Industries ‘Reformobile’.
You’ve heard so many glowing reports about the 2013 Immigration Reformobile and the designers, a group of eight men in the Senate, who have coaxed 60 of their colleagues to invest in it. Here at Immigration Vehicle Trends, we obtained some key details on the new model and are now able to provide you with an outline of the features. There are no advantages or benefits, we’re sorry to report. (Correction – one benefit is provided to illegal motorists, it is the feature known as the ‘Citizenship Path’, referred to by our team of experts as Amnesty).
First, the car looks interesting from the outside – the Obama Media Complex has given it high ratings for it’s stylish trim (appeal to liberals). It has no engine (quantified benefit to the economy), transmission (guarantees of assimilation and English language proficiency) or brakes (guaranteed border enforcement). The Senators behind its development are selling the car without them, but promise to supply them later.
The blueprints for the car (S744) were remarkably lengthy – 1,900 pages, for such a basic and obviously derivative engineering concept. Let’s talk about the engineering philosophy behind this vehicle. This car, the Reformobile, is conceived as basic transportation. It is purposed to transport millions more low / non-skilled migrants into America. The design team, the ‘Gang of Eight’, as they are known in the Immigration ‘Reform’ industry, stridently claim that their wundercar, will not convey more unlicensed immigrants into the country, but we think, having examined the production plans, that they are being unnecessarily modest.
The fact is that, an independent industry review board, the Congressional Budget Office, opined in their report that illegal immigration, would at most, be reduced 25%. We at Immigration Vehicle Trends, suspect, based on our own research of past performance of these vehicle designs, think that the CBO’s projection there might be very over generous. We invited someone who saw the roll out of the 1986 model, into our review labs, to look at the current plans and opine on the ‘new’ proposed plans – Former Attorney General Edwin Meese III. Especially interesting is his assessment of the similarities between the two:
“Advancement to citizenship was not automatic (in ’86). Immigrants had to satisfy various requirements along the way. They had to pay application fees, learn to speak English, understand American civics, pass a medical exam and register for military selective service. Those with convictions for a felony or three misdemeanors were ineligible.
Sound familiar? It’s pretty much the same “penalties and hurdles” set forth by the Gang of Eight. Today they call it a “roadmap to citizenship.” Ronald Reagan called it “amnesty.”
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