Opening question: Which one is Hillary!?
Hillary Rodham Clinton is the one figure uniting religious conservatives frustrated by a leaderless Republican Party that's divided over foreign policy, immigration and social issues.
Boy, I bet you can't guess this is an Assholiated Press wire story, huh?
The prospect of another Clinton White House stirred anguish at the Values Voter Summit this weekend where hundreds of conservative activists debated the GOP's future and warned that the acknowledged but unannounced 2016 Democratic front-runner would cement what they see as President Barack Obama's attack on religious freedom.
"Never forget she will be Barack Obama's third and fourth term as president of the United States," Minnesota-6 Representative Michele Bachmann, an unsuccessful GOP presidential candidate in 2012, said Friday night.
Never forget, Barack Obama will be Barack Obama's third and fourth term as POTUS. Hillary Clinton has as much chance at even the Democrat nomination as she has getting elected mayor of Quahog, Rhode Island. A fact of which Mary Tyler Less would be cognizant, if she wasn't dim-witted enough to have thought herself presidential timbre at one time in the not too distant past.
She was among the high-profile Republicans, including past and prospective White House contenders, at the annual conference attended by some of the most prominent social conservatives and hosted by the Family Research Council, well known for its opposition to abortion and same-sex marriage.
"High-profile" Republicans? I thought we were talking about Michelle Bachmann.
This year's gathering expanded its focus to religious freedom, or the persecution of Christians and their values at home and abroad. It was a message that GOP officials hope will help unify a fractured party and appeal to new voters ahead of November's elections and the next presidential contest.
The Republican Party is not "fractured"; though it isn't for the Tea Party's lack of trying. The Democrats, on the other hand....
On the third hand (if one is Triexian, anyway), good luck getting Republican political consultants to unify around a so-con centered campaign theme.
But it was Clinton's name that was as much a rallying cry as the theme of religious liberty.
I.e. she's the GOP's fundraising scarecrow.
Texas Senator Ted Cruz....
....who is more than intelligent enough to know better, both about Hillary Clinton's political viability and his own dubious presidential qualifications....
....a prospective presidential candidate....
See what I mean?
....challenged Clinton to "spend a day debating" the Denver nuns who run nursing homes for the poor, called the Little Sisters of the Poor Home for the Aged, and have challenged the Obama health law's requirement that some religious-affiliated organizations provide insurance that includes birth control.
Why would she need to debate when she already knows everything?
Former Arkansas Governor Mike Huckabee, a once and perhaps future contender, described Clinton as "tenacious."
"She's got all the skills and would be an incredibly formidable candidate," Huckabee told reporters, suggesting that Clinton is politically vulnerable. "She's got to go out and defend Barack Obama and her record in the first four years she was secretary of state."
Please, do explain to us, Huck, just exactly how and in what ways the Empress is "incredibly formidable"? She carpet-bagged a gift-wrapped U.S. Senate seat in one of the "bluest" states in the country. She ran for president in 2008 as the presumptive general election winner and couldn't get out of the Donk primaries. The Nutroots hate her pasty guts. She's dragging Benghazi and the Obama legacy of division, Ameriphobia, deliberate malaise and decline, economic sabotage, etc., etc., etc. behind her like an anchor. The candidate she most tempermentally resembles is Richard Nixon circa 1962. And she's almost 70 years old and looks at least ten years older, with health concerns to match.
Looks like Huckles has as much political acuity as soon-to-be-former Representative Bachmann and Senator Cruz. Which suggests that the only real division in the Republican Party is between those who can judge political talent and those who cannot.
And that group most assuredly does not include the Assholiated Press, whose analysis of the "crowded, front-runnerless GOP field" sounds less like analysis and more like wishful thinking.
Walker-Cruz '16. You heard it here first.
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