Because when the twenty-first century Buddy Hackett speaks, EVERYBODY listens.
And then bursts out laughing, but they do listen, if only to get the joke:
U.S. Defense [Commissar] Ash Carter on Tuesday warned [Red] China against what he called "aggressive" actions in the South China Sea region, including the placement of surface-to-air missiles on a disputed island, and said they would have consequences.
"[Red] China must not pursue militarization in the South China Sea," Carter said in a wide-ranging speech at the Commonwealth Club in San Francisco. "Specific actions will have specific consequences."
He did not elaborate....
....but underscored the U.S. military's determination to safeguard maritime security around the world, and particularly in the South China Sea region, which sees about 30% of the world's trade transit its waters each year.
Yes, President Teddy Roosevelt was a "progressive," but when he summed up his foreign policy philosophy as "speak softly, but carry a big stick," he was spot on target. This is not that; it is, in fact, the diametric mirror-opposite. Ass Carter, on Barack Obama's behalf, is speaking LOUDLY, while holding no "stick" at all. And both they and the ChiComms are painfully aware of it. As well the established fact that Barack Obama does not start wars or fight wars or win wars, but rather "ends" them. Nobody believes that O would go to war with Red China for any reason, including after an open and all-out ChiComm attack on the United States. Consequently no tough talk such as Carter is burbling here will have anything like its intended effect because Beijing is plainly and simply not listening to anything the Obama Regime says, and has no reason to ever do so.
Which is certainly consistent with their heedless response:
Both [Red] Chinese and foreign security experts say Beijing won't compromise over the Paracels, and it views its forty-two-year grip over the entire archipelago as significantly different to the more fragmented situation further south in the contentious Spratly Islands.
[Red] China does not acknowledge the Paracels are disputed by neighboring Vietnam, repeatedly ignoring Hanoi's requests for talks on the Paracels as part of broader territorial discussions and attempting to force them off the regional diplomatic agenda.
"We're in for a difficult time...when it comes to the Paracels, [Red] China is not going to budge on what it sees as its absolute sovereign rights," said Zhang Baohui, a mainland security expert at Hong Kong's Lingnan University.
"We could see [Red] China acting more swiftly and decisively to anything it sees as a so-called provocation in the Paracels."
Since the U.S. navy dispatched a destroyer to sail close to the Paracels last month, [Red] China has established advanced surface-to-air missiles batteries and re-deployed fighter jets to the islands, prompting U.S.-led protests that Beijing is militarizing the South China Sea.
Foreign Ministry spokeswoman Hua Chunying last week reiterated [Red] China's insistence that the islands were not in dispute, so Beijing could deploy what it wanted on its territory without reproach.
Do you suppose that perhaps the reason why O sent the USS Curtis Wilbur was precisely to provoke the ChiComms into (further) militarizing the Paracels so that he'd have an excuse to back down later? But then that isn't consistent with Carter's Barney Fife-esque blustering, now is it? Beijing, to the degree to which it is acknowledging us at all, is akin to Buford Tannen in Back To The Future III at the Hill Valley town festival asking Marty McFly if he was man enough to back up his strong words with more than just a pie plate. Marty, of course, was; but Barack Obama isn't, and is setting us up for one more huge international humiliation at best, and war with Red China at worse, even before Donald Trump can get into power to start it himself.
At least we're giving them plenty of laughs as they prepare to conquer us. And laughter is the best medicine, whether it's funny or not.