I Just Love Her. Valentine's, 2014.

By Douglas V. Gibbs

I put this on Facebook, at first, and then thought, "Hey, this ought to be on my Political Pistachio website, too!"

Here's what I wrote on Facebook with it:

Happy Valentines Day to my wife of nearly 30 years - made it myself. Two bouquets of a dozen dipped strawberries, a red rose, and unmelted chocolates (yes, the same chocolates used to dip the strawberries). Hey, guys, it was only $15 bucks and it'll make a bigger impact than something bought at a florist.

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Now, let me give a few thoughts about what this really means to me.

My wife, Virginia, and I, have been married a long time.  We have had our good moments, and our rough moments.  The first twenty years were very difficult, and at one point we legally separated for nearly a year.  Ours is one that was forged, as this nation was, through sweat and tears.  It was not always an easy road, but looking back, it was always a worthy road.

Now, many of our friends see ours as a model marriage.  I joke, "You don't see what happens after the door closes."  She says she keeps me around because it would take too long to train another one.

Sure, there are moments we pop off on each other.  There are moments when we irritate the hell out of each other, and perhaps don't say anything.  And then there are moments when we could not even conceive of having anyone else in our lives.  We are busy, we work a lot, and we have precious little time together, but when we have a chance to go to dinner, or play backgammon, we do it - and we do it gladly.

I tell her I work hard so that someday we will have plenty of time together.  She was a stay at home mom when the kids were in the house, and she got a job a couple weeks after our youngest had leaped out of the nest.  Both kids are married, and we have six grandchildren.  Three of them I see often, three I don't.

But in the end, it is about us.  She is my mate.  She is the one I chose to spend my entire life with.  She is the one I love, I am devoted to, and she is the one that will see me someday age and die, or I will see her age and die - and then the remaining one will live life until it is time to join the other in Heaven.

I don't love her because of something she does, or something she gives me.  She's not much of a romantic, but she will enjoy tonight's dinner and dessert.  That's okay, she can appreciate it, or not.  I didn't do it for appreciation.  I don't love her because of what I can get back from her, but simply because I love her.  I do for her because I love her.  That is what I do.

I don't know if my love is patient, or kind, or long suffering as the famous Bible verse goes, but I do know my love is everlasting.  We are nothing alike. The only thing we have in common is our children, and a love for going out to eat every once in a while.  We can't watch TV together, and we have to alternate on who gets to choose what movie we are going to see on the few occasions we go to the theater.  We didn't get matched by some love guru, and we didn't compare algorithms to make sure we are a good fit for each other.  In fact, I am pretty sure none of those new-fangled websites or match-makers would ever even consider putting someone like the two of us together.  We just fell in love.  We became a team in high school, and we married during the summer after graduation.  I have no secret to a long marriage, or a formula to a lasting relationship.

I just love her.

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