It's his, his, all his - the stream on your property, the pond across town, the puddles on your sidewalk after a stiff rain, the saliva in your mouth, the urine in your bladder, the blood in your veins, the very clouds in the sky - all now belong to Barack Hussein Obama by the stroke of his mighty pen.
I suspect the atmosphere - i.e. the air we breathe - will be next:
The Obama administration issued a rule on Wednesday increasing the number of small bodies of water and wetlands that fall under federal protection [i.e. seizure], a move that has riled some lawmakers, business executives and farmers who say the rule unnecessarily expands federal bureaucracy.
The rule, issued jointly by the Environmental Protection Agency and the U.S. Army Corps of Engineers, is estimated to put about 3% more waterways throughout the U.S. under new federal jurisdiction, which will require more permits for use of those waters and could [i.e. will] restrict access altogether, according to the EPA. Agency officials [claimed] Wednesday that the rule will protect drinking water supplies for more than 100 million Americans…
Does that include in California? Probably not.
“My administration has made historic commitments to clean water, from restoring iconic watersheds like the Chesapeake Bay and the Great Lakes....
You mean if not for your administration, Chesapeake Bay and the Great Lakes would have dried up by now? Or did and you filled them up again? Or do you mean that you parted them with your mighty putter when nobody was looking? Is anybody ever not looking at you? Isn't that what the three hundred million sets of alligator clamps are for?
....to preserving [i.e. stealing] more than a thousand miles of rivers and other waters for future generations....
And bleep the current generations who individually owned - past tense - their own respect chunks of them before you confiscated them for yourself.
“With today’s rule, we take another step toward protecting the waters that belong to all of us.”
You know what they say: If something belongs to "everybody," it really belongs to nobody. And if property belongs to nobody, it will be left to deteriorate, rot, and ultimately disintegrate because nobody has any incentive to, that's right, maintain and preserve it.
But you meant "the waters that belong to me," didn't you? By which you meant ALL water.
Aren't convinced yet, folks? Take a gander at his definition of "other waters":
The rule will seek to protect only waterways that have physical features of flowing water, according to a fact sheet about the rule. [emphasis added]
On the vast majority of our planet, water is a non-viscous liquid. Unless frozen solid, it is incapable of not flowing, even on a completely level surface, of which there aren't many. Which means, among other things, that it will really suck for the White House once the coming ice age arrives, but in the mean time also means that all water everywhere within the jurisdiction of the United States government belongs to Barack Hussein Obama. And we can't use it, drink it, dam it, redirect it, swim in it, piss in it, poop in it, or any other application we can think of without his express permission. And that applies to everything from the "mighty Mississip" to the Great Salt Lake to Puget Sound to trout streams to prairie potholes to isolated stretches of cattails to mud puddles to a single raindrop. It's evocative of the old expression, "The only reason you're all breathing is because I ALLOW IT!!!"
Barack Obama has usurped the entire planetary hydrological cycle. And believe it or not, there are some people who think this is <gasp> unconstitutional:
“EPA’s Waters of the United States rule is an attack on individuals’ private property rights under the guise of protecting our country’s waterways. In reality, the rule isn’t about protecting waterways or wetlands. It’s about increasing the size and scope of the federal government and giving Washington bureaucrats more control over what American citizens do on their own property. The WOTUS rule goes far beyond the scope of the Clean Water Act and the Constitution as it usurps the States’ regulatory control over waters within their borders. EPA should withdraw this overreaching and unconstitutional rule.”
Which, of course, they won't. Ever.
But is the AEA right about WOBHO's unconstitutionality? Let's take a look at the relevant portion of the Fifth Amendment, shall we?:
....nor shall private property be taken for public use without just compensation.
Begging the question of who decides what is "just compensation," the feds or the private property owner. For the answer, let us consult America's Constitution authority:
The provisions of the Fifth Amendment are there to keep our courts honest, and the powers of the government constrained. The last phrase of the Fifth Amendment, however, is considered too general by many, and it has been used in a manner by the federal government that is extremely troublesome, because it gives the government the right to take property if there is just compensation.
How is just compensation determined? Is it based on the market value of the property? How do the government officials involved in eminent domain calculate the non-intrinsic value? How do they compensate for the value on which nobody can put a price?
Just compensation was intended to be based on what the property owner deemed to be just. If the property owner did not deem the offer to be just compensation, then the government, from a constitutional viewpoint, is out of luck. [emphases added]
And, of course, the Obama EPA and U.S. Army Corps of Engineers didn't bother with the pretense of a transaction, didn't make any offer whatsoever; they just took "America's water". ALL of it. And by extension, every last piece of formerly private land over which it flows, because if you have water in any way, shape, or form anywhere on your property, you can use or modify neither. If a flood turns your back forty into a swamp, sorry, pal, you can't drain it. If the morning dew alights on your front lawn, sorry, chief, you can't mow it. And if drought is turning your pasture into a dust bowl, too bad, bunkie, you have no access to moisture via irrigation, tanker truck, hose, or any other mode of hydration. And if a passing squall de-parches it, guess what? It now belongs to Barack Hussein Obama.
And there's not a damn thing you, or we, can do about it, because the Constitution belongs to him as well.