PETA Zeros In On Baseball's Marlins

By Douglas V. Gibbs

My message to PETA, the extremists that have taken the good intention of protecting animals to a level of radical proportions, is normally that I love animals too. . . They taste great.

Like most radical activist groups, PETA lacks common sense. It is groups that run in the same gutter with PETA that turned off the water to California's Central Valley over a 2-3 inch long fish.

Now the PETA freaks have turned their eyes toward the Baseball Club Florida Marlins. It seems that the ownership of the Marlins has a great idea for their new stadium - Aquariums full of live fish. The aquarium plans were unveiled last week, and the plans include see-through tanks constructed with the same material used in bullet-proof glass to ensure fish safety.

"No, no, no," says PETA. "Being exposed to the loud crowds, bright lights, and reverberations of a baseball stadium would be stressful and maddening for any large animals held captive in tanks that, to them, are like bathtubs."

What's next? Will I need to turn off my television when the dog walks in because the additional sounds are confusing to the poor animal?

Marlins president David Samson says the fish will be "treated as well, or better, than any fish can be," and didn't sound willing to budge on the issue.

"I guess that's a philosophical issue," Samson also said. "But there are beautiful aquariums all over the world and this will be one of them."

Technology is great, and the impact of the stadium's sounds and lights should be minimal on the creatures.

PETA would prefer the owners of the ball club put robotic fish in the tank.

Hey, maybe some credit is due. Usually PETA just protests. At least this time they came up with possible alternatives - as loony as they may be.

I would prefer that PETA goes back to hugging wayward squirrels, or something.

-- Political Pistachio Conservative News and Commentary

PETA objects to Florida Marlins' aquarium plan at new stadium - Miami Herald