Email of the Week: Why Muslims Are Suicide Bombers

Posted by Douglas V. Gibbs

Warning: The following is an observation, and an attempt at humor, by the writer of the email.  The email is laced with some truth, but the generalizations may not necessarily be completely accurate.  For my commentary on this email, GO HERE.

Seems logical (warning, a few rough words):

Everyone seems to be wondering why Muslim
Terrorists are so quick to commit suicide.

Lets have a look at the evidence:

No Christmas
No television
No nude women
No football
No pork chops
No hot dogs
No burgers
No beer
No bacon
Rags for clothes
Towels for hats
Constant wailing from some idiot in a tower
More than one wife
More than one mother in law
You can't shave
Your wife can't shave
You can't wash off the smell of donkey
You cook over burning camel shit
Your wife is picked by someone else for you
and your wife smells worse than your donkey
Then they tell you that "when you die, it all gets better"??

Well no mystery, Sherlock!....
It's not like it could get much worse
THE MUSLIMS ARE NOT HAPPY!

They're not happy in Gaza ...
They're not happy in Egypt ....
They're not happy in Libya ...
They're not happy in Morocco ..
They're not happy in Iran ...
They're not happy in Iraq ..
They're not happy in Yemen ..
They're not happy in Afghanistan ...
They're not happy in Pakistan ...
They're not happy in Syria ...
They're not happy in Lebanon ...

SO, WHERE ARE THEY HAPPY?

They're happy in Australia .
They're happy in Canada ....
They're happy in England ......
They're happy in France .....
They're happy in Italy .....
They're happy in Germany ......
They're happy in Sweden .....
They're happy in the USA .....
They're happy in Norway .....
They're happy in Holland ....
They're happy in Denmark ...

Basically, they're happy in every country that is not Muslim
and unhappy in every country that is!

AND WHOM DO THEY BLAME?

Not Islam.
Not their leadership.
Not themselves.

THEY BLAME THE COUNTRIES THEY ARE HAPPY IN!

AND THEN; They want to change those countries to be like....
THE COUNTRY THEY CAME FROM WHERE THEY WERE UNHAPPY!

Excuse me, but I can't help wondering...
How dumb can you get!

-- Political Pistachio Conservative News and Commentary